I promise I won't update with weekly ultrasounds...

But just wanted to say...that we got yet another great view of the little booth today. We decided that we don't like saying him/her all the time...or it...so we will call the baby Buddy. Buddy the Elf. :0) Or little buddy...whatever we feel like. So we saw little buddy today and everything looked marvelous again. We have the very best ultrasound tech EVER. She isn't normally supposed to say anything to us about what she sees, but she knows what we've been through and she knows we know a lot more about what should be...than most. So she talks to us...and I love it. Today the heartbeat was 166 BPM measuring .5 inch at 7 weeks 6 days. AND...she pointed out the beginnings of the umbilical cord. Which we have never seen before!!! So now...we wait for next week's appointment...this appointment is fairly large for us...as we have have before been past 8 weeks. So we continue to trust the God bigger than my past realities. We continue to pray for our little buddy that he hangs on grows strong so we can love him for the rest of his life. Each week we get closer to the end of the first trimester, and each week our hope continues to build. At this point...we are allowing that. We are allowing ourselves to be excited. No, we aren't talking about names and picking out nursery decor, but we are excited every day that I "feel pregnant" and rejoice in knowing that God's faithfulness to us through the last 2 years is amazing...something we don't deserve...but something he grants us freely. He welcomes us to be a part of who He is and His plan and I trust that explicitly.

Ultrasound and the return of nervousness....

So today was the first ultrasound and I found myself sitting in the waiting room of the ultrasound place with the return of the nervousness...the anxiousness of the first look. So many expections are wrapped up in the first appointment...will there be little baby there, will there be evidence of anything at all, will there be heartbeat...so many things to think about. But in the midst of the anxiousness, we bravely walked into the room together and saw our little guy's (or gal's) heartbeat!! It was pure magic. We saw it instantly and instantly i was connected. All the nervousness melted away and I found myself verified in all the symptoms I had been feeling over the last week. All those times where I felt little twinges meant that it was "normal". I don't know normal. I have never known what normal is in terms of pregnancy. I can only find myself comparing it to what I know to be abnormal...which for me is normal. So there was a lot of relief for me today in regards to what is considered "normal". I now know that at least for me...what i've been experiencing can be categorized as normal. We saw the little heartbeat beating so strongtly at 122 BPMs and measuring less than .25 inch at 6 weeks 4 days. It was awesome. And so now...we press on to next week...living not in fear of what the future could hold...but in trust that God of this universe hold the future.

Positive!

So we got the green light from the doctor on December 22nd right. On January 5th at 3am...i had to pee. So I did what every logical trying-to-get-pregnant-and-have-it-work person would do. I peed on that stick regardless of what time it was! And at 3 am...it read...PREGNANT!!! WAHOO!!! So i woke up Mike and told him. We prayed...then went back to sleep.

The next morning I called Dr. V to make sure that my current regimen wasn't going to affect the baby. He told me what to do and I did it. I then immediately called the OB/GYN that he referred me to and booked my appointment, called the old doctor and had my records transferred. We did this for many reasons...but the biggest being. We wanted a fresh new start. We wanted doctors that didn't already do the "I'm sorry head tilt". Dr. B's office had great intentions adn they were great for the season that we were in. But now we are moving on to other things...Dr. S knows Dr. V and she knows how he practices medicine. This makes me very comfortable. This means that unlike the other doctors I've encountered...she won't look at me like I have 3 heads and have sprouted horns when I tell her my miscarriage issue might be related to gluten.

So we wait in anticipation for the first ultrasound!!! Yay! :0)