I may be an extrovert...but there are parts of me that remain introverted. There are certain times in my life where I want to be by myself, where I become overwhelmed with too much chaos and loudness, and there are also many things that I keep to myself. Not in a bad way, but in a...i don't think everyone cares to know all these weird, sad, happy things about me. But...there are people in my life that love me deeply; that know my heart and soul. They know these things about me because they invest their time and soul into knowing me. It's not like I sat these people down and took out my powerpoint agenda and went through a whole Couple Retreat type presentation on the high's and lows of my life and why they would benefit from knowing these things. These people know who I am because they care to know...because they love me and because we share our lives together. One of these people is my sissy...Kari.
She is by far...one of my very best friends. In fact, in addition to Mike, she is the person who truly knows me best. She is an amazing sister and friend. She loves deeply, is fiercely loyal, is an amazing mama, and is thoughtful beyond words. She has the ability to calm wild and crazy people, the personality that stands up for what is right and for what she believes in, and a passion for making those people she loves...feel loved. We have shared many things over the years...and I wouldn't trade those things for anything in the world. We have had good time for sure! And we have shared sad times as well. But the point is...she knows me. In the very moment where I think to myself...no one else around me knows what it's like to almost have a child and then lose it...I am reminded that her and Tyler faced that very thing with their almost adopted baby. When I laugh out loud to myself at a someone donning the most completely ridiculous outfit in a store or when I do something in public that is completely embarrassing...in that moment I know that if she would have just seen the outfit or witnessed my public embarrassment...she too would be laughing out loud. When I just feel like browsing Crate and Barrel or Anthropologie and I think to myself...who wants to drive there with me just so I can possible walk out with nothing buy...she would. We share similarities and yet we are completely different. We share our souls...and that is something that will never change.
The reason this blog post is being written is because of my birthday present from her. I realize it was a month ago...but I had to give myself time to write with a clear head and not short circuit my keyboard from all the tears that would have come had I written this directly after she gave me my present. This is what she gave me...
So when I opened the present I was already in love with it! And then when she explained it...I had no words...just a heart full of joy and love. We just held each other and cried.
The explanation...M&K obviously is for Mike and Kelly...Booth our last name. And those 3 beautiful pearls...my 3 babies that never made it to my arms. And just when you thought it couldn't possibly get anymore thoughtful and amazing...it does. Those 3 pearls are very purposefully colored. They are colored the birth month color for the months in which my babies would have been born. June = white pearl, March = aquamarine, and September = sapphire. It's my family...it's me, mike and our little babes. This very gift is EXACTLY what I've been writing about. No one understands me like she does. Who in the world takes the time to remember when my maybe babies would have been born, who takes the time to design it and order it special for me...she does. She wanted me to know that she knows...she wanted me to be able to have something to think of them by. And it's all because she loves me...she truly truly loves me. She has seen my pain and remembers always that it stays with me and I think of our babies often. She is the one that knows those dates are hard for me and on those days writes me a card and give me flowers. She knows that mother's day has a different meaning for me at this point in my life because I can't hold my babies that my heart loved from day one. And so there was no more perfect gift than that necklace. I wear it always. I wore it for our family pictures...I wear it at work, church, sometimes at night. And the best part is...i don't have to share what it means with anyone else unless I want to. She made it so that it's discreet. She made it so that I know what it means and my family knows what it means, but i don't have to tell the story over and over to strangers if I don't want to. Sometimes I look at that necklace and I just cry...not all the time do I cry because I'm sad. But because the necklace reminds me of my sister and her awesomeness and her thoughtfulness. It reminds me that she gets it... She is amazing woman, a strong woman, a devoted wife and mom, and an unbelievably thoughtful and loving friend. Her friendship calms me and our silent understanding of each other lives...make my heart smile. There is no one like her. I love her.
She just gets me...
